Today my son Raferty turned 5. By far I think it was the best day of his life. He was smiling and happy from the moment he woke up until just a few minutes ago when he finally fell asleep. This little big boy faced a few challenges today as well. He said goodbye to his night time dummy and nappies. The dummy especially has been a real comfort for Raf for virtually every day of his life. Imagine giving up something like that cold turkey. The boy must have a strong mind.
Today it’s also exactly two months until The North Face 100. ‘The Face’ is a 100km event in the Blue Mountains that I have signed up for. It’s been nearly two years since I first heard about it. Not long after that I started thinking about it and training for it every day. Every training run has been part of the build towards Face, every event I’ve completed has been part of the education needed to attempt the FACE. Every time I’ve had a big night, I’ve made sure I recovered quickly by hydrating massively so I could get out on the trails asap. In my mind the Face has become the pinnacle, the grand final and the ultimate event that I will ever run.
This week I should have probably run somewhere between 100 and 130km. Instead I have done zero. Since my last event I have tried to run four times in 22 days. Each time, in pain. Each run cut short of what I had planned. Something is obviously wrong but as I write I’m still not quite sure of the extent of my injury. An x-ray was taken and I find out in two days if I have a stress fracture in my left foot or not. I would bet Raf’s birthday money that it’s a fracture.
When I started training for this thing I knew the event would be amazingly tough. However the toughest part of the lead up has been the last 22 days. So many things have gone through my mind.
The facts are that I’ve booked long service leave to do the event, paid for flights, paid for accommodation, organised family to be there with me, organised family to look after my two year old while away......on the running side of things, I’ve run thousands of kilometres in all sorts of conditions at all hours of the day and night.
I had been coping fairly well with the injury up until three days ago when the foot started hurting more and more than it ever had. At that point I thought of everything I was going to have to give up. Everything I was going to lose. I had been thinking I’d just be going into the event underdone but now I was pretty sure I wasn’t even going to make it to the start line. Pretty shattered.
Today, 61 days away from the event I learn from a 5 year old who gave up his dummy. He loved that thing for years and the thought of losing it was actually a bit frightening. When it came to the crunch though and life as he knew it changed, he just took it in his stride like it was no big deal. Keeping the dummy was definitely something he wanted to do but right now he’s sound asleep without a care in the world.
If it comes to it and I can’t do the FACE, although life will change from what I had hoped, really not much will be different. I’ve built this thing up in my mind to be big but is it? It’s definitely something I want to do but just because I miss out on a positive, that really shouldn’t put me in the negative. You can’t lose if you have a crack, even if that crack turns out be a fracture.
I just watched the NF100 video on the site; inspirational stuff. I can see why 1) you want to do it Dave, 2) why at this time now (60 days out) you are concerned as to whether you are able to do it.
ReplyDeleteOur kids are such a reflection of ourselves, but without the over analyses and personal expectations. It is therefore great when we can receive some of the positives we have instilled in our kids back from them...well done Raf!
Dave, whatever happens will be the right thing, dissapointing or otherwise. if this year is a 'no go' i wouldn't bet against you getting a Silver buckle next year! talking of net year- i feel inspired to focus on it now after viewing the vid, WHAT A RUN!
If you do deem yourself fit to go, let me know about your "must have" equipment needs as i have most of it (as per race requirements) and am happy to loan it to you for the event.
all the best for a speedy recovery and positive x-ray results.
stoph
Thanks Stoph, very much appreciation. It will still hopefully be a great experience. I'll let you know re any gear, I have most of it but if you could spare a left foot that might help.
ReplyDeleteI know you make a very good dad right now Dave; kids soak up everything you do and say in their own way and learn from you. However, I can't help but think that when your kids are older and develop further cognitively and emotionally they will appreciate you even more. Those kids have been so blessed to have you as their father (and Leah as their mother, of course). Your sense of perspective and your ability to rise up to and overcome challenges is awe inspiring.
ReplyDeleteThanks Faith, really appreciate your words. You're pretty freakin awesome yourself.
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